Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Bloody Beeping Buses

I am sure I am not the only Hanoian who is in serious disagreement with Hanoi buses and in particular their over enthusiastic use of the horn. The constant “beep beep” from the motorbikes I can accept and tolerate, in fact I appreciate the symbolic relevance to the culture of the city, but the buses give me the shits and scare me half to death.

If I am in front of a bus I soon know it because the sound from the horn sends shocks throughout my body and when my heart decides to restart I have a few seconds to bridge the gap with the earsplitting monster before the deafening pain continues. In extreme circumstances the horn can and should be used but in Hanoi it seems the driver has the horn on auto with the traffic in front of the bus having no relevance to its use. This is a blatant misuse of power and something needs to be done. Eardrums, weak hearts and our general level of sanity are calling for action. Evil stares in the driver’s direction only results in a kind yet slightly mischievous smile.

Driving behind a bus is equally damaging to your health; this time sucking down the dirty fumes the bus spits out at an alarming rate. When I find myself in this situation I hold my breath as I frantically try and get round the beast of a machine. When my attempts are fruitless my lungs are engulfed with a black death and I can feel the days trimmed from my life. I usually stop to the side of the road until my coughing fit subsides. This can’t continue and I am demanding a complete ban of all buses in this city.

I am yet to take a bus in this city and it seems my deep threaded hatred of public transport is continuing in Asia. So I ask the government nicely; can you please take the buses off the roads. I would be ever so grateful.

Otherwise extremely happy expat!

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